Welcome to My Journey: Embracing Neurodiversity, Caregiving, and Self-Discovery

Welcome to my little corner of the world! This blog is a space where I’ll share my story—my struggles, joys, and the lessons I’ve learned along the way. I hope you can connect with my experiences, as we navigate the complexities of mental illness, neurodiversity, and caregiving together. I hope we can learn together and I can also offer some wisdom.

A Personal "Coming Out"

This blog marks a significant moment for me. Not many people in my life are aware of the extent of my truth—my past, present, and future struggles. Here, I refuse to edit or hide parts of my identity to make others comfortable. Growth often occurs outside our comfort zones, and I aim to create an authentic space for open discussion.

I’m a nearly 40-year-old woman discovering who I am beyond the labels and roles society has assigned me.

Who I Am

I’m compassionate to a fault and believe true love is tested when times are tough. I often say "It's all well and good to say you love someone when loving them is easy, but can you truly say you love someone until you love them even when it's hard." I often find solace in the company of animals—I've never had to mask my true self around them. Cooking is my love language; I take joy in preparing elaborate meals, even on ordinary days. I love reading, especially fantasy and non-fiction, which allow me to escape and learn simultaneously---with the added benefit of giving me conversation starters for the occasions when dreaded small talk is necessary. I love music and the power it has to speak truth and connect. I love creativity and craft. I love learning and philosophy and deep conversations with a wonderful person while everyone else is sleeping.

I have a dry, dark humor that not all may appreciate, but it helps me cope. I am rediscovering my faith after years away, but I am not here to evangelize. People will find what speaks to them in their own time; however, I will be sharing things that talk to me-- music, poems, art, videos, and even scripture--take what works for you and leave what doesn't.

After 15 years of marriage and a life in the American Southwest, I’m still a Midwesterner at heart. I’ve spent nearly 13 years teaching at a community college, where I found fulfillment in mentoring others. My journey in a traditional working role ended in February of 2023 and I'm trying to discover my inherent value outside of America's obsession with the single road to success. I'm finding who I am at 40 and living the cliche. Maybe I'll move to Tuscany and renovate a villa.

Facing the Hard Truths

Now, for the challenging parts of my story. I am neurodivergent (ADHD) and was diagnosed with Bipolar I at 30. I also live with anxiety and PTSD. My childhood was far from idyllic—chaos would best describe it. After my fifth hospitalization in February 2023, my husband and I decided it was best for me to stop working a traditional job. Since then, I’ve taken on the role of caregiver for my 70-year-old father, who has untreated mental illness and possible dementia. He now lives with us, relying on me for support.

My life has changed dramatically as I navigate caregiving, my mental health challenges, and my mystery chronic illness. Balancing household responsibilities, caring for my father, and maintaining my relationship with my husband has been overwhelming. As I approach 40, I find myself longing for a purpose beyond the daily grind of caregiving and self-care.

I share this with the world in hoping to find people out there who relate, to make me feel less alone, and hopefully make them feel less alone.

Why I’m Here

This blog is my outlet for sharing the daily struggles I face with ADHD, mood disorders, and caregiver burnout. I aim to provide resources, coping strategies, and a sense of community for others experiencing similar challenges. While you may not relate to everything I share, I hope you find something positive in this journey of reclaiming my power and purpose.

Join the Conversation

I invite you to introduce yourself in the comments. Let’s build a supportive community where we can remove our exhausting masks and share our true selves, even if only for a moment. Here, it’s okay to be “too much” sometimes.

Until next time, take care!

All the best,

CLD

Tags:

#Keepontrucking #neurodiversity #ADHD #masking #introduction #hotmessexpress #caregivers #caregiverburnout #community #MentalHealth #CaregiverSupport #Community #SelfDiscovery #JourneyToHealing #FindingPurpose #unmaskyourself